THE PERFECTION FOUND IN ROSES

Perfection. 

Its all around us, or so that's what we believe. At first glance, these roses look perfect. Each dainty petal is beautifully placed and intertwined. The petals layer one on top of the other in an alluring and unrepeatable sequence. The leaves, symmetrical, the stems, cut evenly. Every aspect of these roses are nothing less than perfect. However, what you cannot see upon first glance may be the most important and beautiful aspect of them all.

What you cannot see upon first glance is the hands that have cut these roses from their bush, the florist who spent countless hours making sure each and every petal was in place and the simply the perfect shade of red. You cannot see the worker who tirelessly measured and cut each stem so that they will all fall evenly into their final destination and look nothing less than perfect for their recipient. These roses have gone through a series of stages and have been plucked, and twisted, and painted, and changed, to become what we perceive to be 'perfect'.  Despite the amount of work that has been done to these roses in order to achieve their state of beauty, they are nonetheless described as unflawed. However upon further inspection one may notice that they have wrinkles, dark spots, missing leaves, missing petals, the list could go on and on. 

I believe that sometimes we do this with people too. 

We pluck, and twist, and paint, and change, people, including ourselves, constantly so that they may become what we deem to be perfect. We are not roses. We are not flowers. We are ourselves, and we were made to be just that.  

I would describe myself as very observant. I like to observe things, specifically my peers actions, dispositions, words, and physical appearances. I find it to be a blessing and a curse. For example, if I am walking at night, I observe my surroundings thoroughly. I know how many cars are around me, how many people are walking near me, what street I'm on, etc. And that's a blessing to be able to focus on more than one task at a time, however when it comes to being a teenage girl at an all girls high school it can cause some slight mental exhaustion. When I was younger I was constantly comparing myself to the way the girls around me appeared. All day, everyday. "Her stomach's flatter than mine." "Her teeth are perfectly straight." "Her skin is so clear, mine could never look that beautiful." Sometimes things your friends were insecure about, made you insecure about, because it was difficult for you to find fault in them and understand where their insecurity was stemming from. You saw them as beautiful or even perfect, but yet they saw themselves as unworthy. How can I see myself in a positive way when someone who I adore can't even do that? It was tiring. I just wanted to block it all out and be able to focus on myself, as narcissistic as that may sound. 

So that's exactly what I did. 

I stopped caring about the way others looked, and I began to care about myself. But because I stopped observing other's physical appearances doesn't mean I stopped observing their attitudes. I observe the changes in my friends attitudes whenever someone jokes with them about their appearance. I notice the slight changes they make in themselves for the weeks to come after that one incidence. Their demeanor may change and they may begin to compare the amount or characteristics of the food they consume to that of someone who they regard as perfect. They may begin to wear makeup to cover their freckles or acne, unique traits that they didn't feel they needed to hide before. Some may even begin to wear different clothes to hide the 'imperfection' that has been made aware to them. Some experience feelings of frustration because they are eating, working out, and doing all the same things as someone who they see as perfect, but yet they aren't getting the same results. This can cause anger and resentment towards ourselves, towards our bodies, when our bodies are truly all we own. 

JUST BECAUSE YOU HAVE  DIFFERENCES DOES NOT MEAN YOU ARE FLAWED

In the past two weeks I've been observing the girls around me and paying more attention to their current state. And they all have one thing on their minds, spring break. We all know and love it, all of your girl (and guy;)) friends in one place having the time of their lives. It sounds and looks like a dream. But, it's similar to the roses, it's been heavily curated and planned, plucked, twisted, and changed from a typical beach trip to the most important beach trip of the year for a teenager. The people around me, girls and boys, have also been twisting themselves to find their best angle, plucking every hair from their bodies, planning when and where they are going to take the most 'instagrammable' pictures, and changing themselves from what they were beautifully created as into what they deem to be 'perfect'. Girls have begun to eat less, and guys have begun to workout more. Both in hopes they will attain the 'perfect' figure for a simple, five day, meticulously planned, beach trip. 

PERFECTION IS FAKE 

No one is perfect. Not a single human alive in this entire world. Perfection doesn't truly exist. Perfection is simply a bar set by ourselves that not a single one of us will ever reach. 

So why do we spend our whole lives striving for it, for this certain form of validation? 

We all are in a constant race for perfection. We all strive to be the best, at everything. The closer we come to accepting the fact that we will never be perfect, the closer we actually get to perfection. Even the most 'perfect' of people have imperfections. Wrinkles, dark spots, missing leaves and petals adorn all of us, even the ones we idolize the most. Those who turn these 'imperfections' into their favorite aspects of themselves are those who we often find ourselves attracted to most. 

The day we accept our differences and see them as a unifying gift rather than a separating burden is the day that we will all finally feel completely comfortable in our skin. Each freckle, pimple, and extra tummy roll will be viewed as unique, and beautiful in consequence. No matter how hard we try to be as flawless and perfectly curated as the roses, we will always have our differences which make us who we are, and that is the most important value of them all. We will often try to be our own florist and spend hours at work making ourselves presentable for people who often have the exact same imperfections hidden. When we break down our walls and allow those to see us with our flaws, it allows us to understand that no one is perfect and that we are all spectacular in our own unique and unrepeatable ways. 

Fallon